Caught Redheaded

In one of the more hilarious headlines I've seen in awhile, a bunch of Ginger's at some California middle school were the focus of beatings simply because they're pale, freckly and their hair is orange. Also the picture to the left is the picture from the article. How funny is that? It's like the editor asked to find the funniest picture of a ginger ever. He's at the beach, fully clothed, in the shade and obviously rocking the nerd essentials: glasses. Anyway, we all have friends who are gingers and we never let them forget that they are gingers. We'll laugh at them when they have to wear SPF 500 at the beach, or poke fun at the fact they their pubes resemble Cheetos more than they do hair. I have this ongoing joke with one my buddies who happens to be a ginger. I always tell him that whatever he touches gets Cheetos powder all over it because I mean, if there was one type of powder gingers would excrete it would totally be Cheetos powder.

Back in the day when I was in middle school we had ridiculous days similar to "Kick A Ginger Day" but we avoided being racist by pulling the standard "pick on the kid who sucks at sports and weighs 50 pounds less than you, no matter what his skin color was." This usually only left the nerdy jewish kids, and asians to get bullied on "Wedgie Week." Yeah, at my middle school we devoted an entire week to giving kids wedgies. Is there anything more stereotypical than giving little nerds wedgies? Oh man, I can't imagine the emotional pain I caused kids when I was in middle school. You know how in Billy Madison the character played by Steve Buscemi has a list of people to kill? Well if I continued to be the same "bad ass" I was in middle school I'd be on a butt load of people's list.

Back to the story though. It pisses me off that they blame South Park for the incident. Shut the fuck up people. When shit hits the fan parents just blame the easiest scapegoat instead of themselves. I mean, everyone makes fun of gingers. For those of you who watched "Summer Heights High" you'd know the character Jonah made fun of "rangas" since they looked like Orangutans. Let's not forget I absolutely love South Park. The episode two weeks ago they actually killed a ginger. In one of the funniest beginnings to a South Park ever, Gordon Stoltski is murdered over the morning announcements. I don't think I ever laughed so hard at the beginning of a South Park episode in my life. But anyway, South Park never promoted kicking gingers, they just always showed Cartman's hatred for them, and that gingers may or may not have souls. I'm not approving beating the shit out of a kid because he happens to have orange colored hair, but I can't help but kinda smile on the inside thinking about a bunch of little snot nosed middle schoolers planning this day. I'm sure they were thinking of going with beating up maybe the asian kids, but since all gingers are white, they figured it wouldn't be that big of a deal in terms of "race relations."