Celeb Spottings

Last night I went out for a lovely pre-Thanksgiving dinner with the special lady. Really classed it up too, went to the posh David Burke Townhouse for some quality food, lovely ambiance and a nice bottle of wine. Meal was great, service was fantastic, and when I was about to leave I was pretty content. On my way out however I got the added satisfaction of one of my favorite things ever; random celebrity spotting. Although the level of his celebrity is questionable, Zack Effron was eating in the restaurant. It was a strange scene, him being with a group of older people, one dude pulling on his skinny tie while everyone else oogled his dreamy “I just rolled out bed” hair cut, but still a celebrity spotting. He gave the two of us a serious glance, but I couldn’t tell if he was eye-fucking me or my special lady. Either way I’m all for it.

So even when it’s a celebrity I don’t respect at all, random spottings are awesome. Yeah, I’ve spotted my fair share of athletes, coaches and seen some serious celebs from a far, but the random ones are the best. One time a friend of mine saw John Goodman walking on the streets in New York. That’s a top-notch spot. I’d rather see him randomly keeping to himself than see Angelina Jolie swamped by paparazzi. So while my experiences are probably not too red-carpet, it made me want to do a Top 5 Random Celebrity Spottings I’ve had. Tom and I saw the dad from Blank Check one time, but he narrowly missed the list. MGM and I once saw Alan Arkin munching on a grilled chicken ceaser salad, but that guy’s got an Oscar. I’ve seen Chevy Chase a few times, he even asked me on a date once, but I’m talking totally random spottings. Guys you have to double check are celebrities. Here goes.

5: Paul Guilfoyle

Don’t worry; I had no idea what his name was either, but when I spotted him cruising around Grand Central station, dressed like an upscale hobo I thought to myself, “Is that the dude from Striptease?” Everyone would recognize him if they saw him, but not be able to tell you what he’s from, and those are the best spots there are. The best part is that it would’ve been easy to mistake him for a homeless person; he was wearing raggy old jeans, a flannel shirt at looked like he hadn’t showered in days. Looks like he’s on CSI now. Good for you Paul, steps in the right direction.

4. Joshua Jackson

This only makes it into the Top 5 because of where I spotted him and what he was doing. Obviously he was awesome as Charlie Conway, but I never watched Dawson’s Creek or Fringe. But When I saw Charlie Conway packing a flapper up in section 337 of Giants Stadium during the 49ers game last year, I became his number one fan. Why in God’s name does Charlie Conway have worse seats than me at the G-Men game? And he wasn’t with his smoking hot girlfriend or some other celeb; he was with some fat dude from jersey who was bumming beers off of him. Charlie Conway is a bro…a serious one.

3: Chris Elliot

This one really got me excited. The guy known better as the creepy guy with the "strong hand," Cabin Boy or Dom Wooginowski is a quality celeb spotting. Caught him munching on some grub at a little place called Ching’s Table in New Canaan, CT. Quality meal as I’m sure some of our Connecticut readers will attest. The urge to approach him and say, “do you know what it’s like to have a whitehead on your EYEBALL,” was immense. Unfortunately I pussied out.

2. John Lithgow

Career revitalization due to his creepy role on season four of my favorite show Dexter boosted him all the way up to 2. I was riding a train from Philly to New York minding my own business when I noticed people kept walking by, staring at the dude in front of me and whispering to each other. I didn’t want to be the weirdo peering over the seat, so I was going to wait to see who it was. Fortunately for me, a woman whose accent, hair, clothes and general demeanor screamed Staten Island walked by, stopped and said, “OH MY GOD are you John Lithgow?” Got to hand it to the guy, handled it well, wouldn’t be surprised if he banged her.

1: Marc Summers

Seriously, does a random celebrity spotting get any better than this? The dude is an icon for guys our age. First, he smoothly narrated our childhood game show fetish on Double Dare and What Would You Do? Now his sultry voice and cool demeanor guide is through our stoner TV sessions on the Food Networks Unwrapped. As any good purveyor of useless knowledge knows, Summers has extreme OCD, with rumors that he combs his rugs. Apparently he has a rough time getting slimed on Nickelodeon, which doesn’t really surprise me. If I had OCD I think all that shit would make me lose my mind. I saw him in an Italian restaurant in Philadelphia, eating with what must’ve been friends. Obviously I sent out a mass text telling everyone about my clutch spot. The best response was “I double dare you to dump your pasta on his head.”

That dog’ll hunt