I watch tons of TV. I only watch a limited number of shows religiously, but I still obviously enjoy other shows and will watch them if they're on. One of my favorite shows is the The First 48. It's basically real life NYPD Blue/CSI: (Insert City) and shows you how real cops, who crush doughnuts and coffee, arrest people with names like Tron, or Red. If you're named after a color you know you're a bad ass. Anyway, The First 48 is on A&E. This network doesn't really air different stuff aside from cops and robbers shows, and ghost shows. The ghost shows are the worst.
Now, let me just start off by saying, if there's one thing that scares the crap out of me, it's ghosts. Yes, ghosts. I'm not talking about your friendly, happy go lucky ghosts like Casper, I'm talking about your Blair Witch Project, Exorcism of Emily Rose, Paranormal Activity ghosts. Now, although no one in the history of the world has ever documented or caught a ghost on tape, or even has proof that ghosts exists, there's a side of me that is still scared by the whole idea that there are crazy, evil entities just floating around waiting to fuck with you. Now, I know that is pretty retarded of me, but I'm not nearly as retarded as the people that appear on these ghost TV shows. You see, I have my normal thought process that says "Yeah, ghosts don't exist," which I guess outweighs my 6-year old thought process that says "ghosts totally exist and one lives under my bed."
But again, the people on these ghost TV shows like "Paranormal State" or "Ghost Hunters" just blame any type of sound, or electrical failure on evil spirits. What's even worse is that the people who are a part of these ghost hunting teams get paid to explain all of this shit. What a huge fucking con. I think I'm going to start my own ghost hunting team. It seems pretty fucking easy. Obviously there are going to be bangs, and lights will flicker from time to time, so all you have to do is blame some crazy, evil spirits. After a few days you say "yup, the spirits have left...that'll be $5, 000." What I hate the most about the ghost hunters is that they sit around with little voice recorders and ask the apparent ghosts questions. Yes, this makes tons of sense. Apparently, ghosts only have the capability to whisper very, very lowly into a small recorder. Doesn't that kind of go against the whole idea that ghosts exists? Whenever something does happen on these shows they never really say what it was, or even show it. One of the bros will be like, "Oh man, this room creeps me out, oh man I see a shadowy thing right there duuude..duude its looking at me...but...only..I can see it! RUUUNNNN!" What? Fuck you. These ghost hunters have a very similar job as a children's book author. They get paid to really not do that much.
2 comments:
Im not going to lie, going for a midnight snack is clutch, and one of the best things in the world, but when you have to go back upstairs in the dark always creeps me out. I always just close my eyes and then tear up the stairs. Call me a pansy but I not going to risk the possibility of a ghost riding my back. I guess it balances out. The joy of having orange juice and frosted flakes before bed narrowly beats out the pants shitting horror of walking up a dark flight of stairs by yourself.
You could start your ghost hunter show in the basement of herring cole. That place is dirty.
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