I'm Here to Win a Bowl Game...and a PS3

Any blue-blooded American male loves college football bowl season. Yeah the pundits say there are too many, and they’re just excuses to make money for the schools and the sponsors, but the concept of a smorgasbord of extravagant college football games over a month’s time is awesome. And for a lot of these guys on lower-level teams, this will be the highlight of their athletic careers; the culmination of a lifetime of blood, sweat a tears into a sport they love. But success on the field and the glory that comes with it is not the only cool thing about going to a bowl; bowl gifts are pretty sweet too.

We’ve all seen the jump suits, the gear or the occasional I-pod mini these players get, but I think most people would be surprised to see some of the goods these bros get their mitts on. Laptops, watches, Bose stereos, cell phones, recliners; all legit stuff. And this isn’t just the BCS teams; you get a Sony gift suite and a watch for finishing 6th in Conference USA. Seriously, look at the link at the bottom; the BCS National Championship game has some of the weakest gifts on the list. And look at the Cotton Bowl, it doesn’t release what gifts it give. You know what that means? Its gifts suck. Probably get a shirt that says “I played in the Cotton Bowl and all I got was the lousy T-shirt.” Certain bowl games also give regional gifts, like Hawaiian shirts and leis at the Hawaii bowl, oversized belt buckles at the Texas Bowl, or cut-off jean shorts and a trailer park in the St. Petersburg Bowl. It’s not just a game and a grab bag, it’s a cultural event.

The NCAA permits each bowl to provide $500 worth of gifts to be awarded at the bowl site. The new trend however, is not just giving gifts to the players; it’s giving shopping sprees to the teams. A least half of the 34 bowl games to be played this year chose to give the participating players a $500 shopping spree instead of just standard gifts. “Look, it just doesn't make sense to kind of guess on an electronic item, a branded item and just guess what kids want,” says Steve Hogan, CEO of the Florida Citrus Sports. Got to hand it to him, it really doesn’t make sense; the brain-trust at Little Ceaser's pizza picking out gifts for a bunch of young huge black dudes? It would be like that lady on your block who gave out raisins on Halloween growing up.

Now, these shopping sprees are limited to what they call “gift suites.” Meaning, the players get $500 to spend on a Sony suite or a Best Buy suite, where they basically have a $500 gift card to each place. But can you imagine if they bowls started giving players flat out 500 bone sprees? It would be hilarious; 100 meat-bags rampaging through a mall out of control. You’d be at the mall near the Orange Bowl and the line from footlocker would be out the door; there’d be no Jordan’s left over for all the Jewish kids from the suburbs to buy. Panda Express would be out of food, there would be no more PS3’s in the entire mall and the jewelry stores would be overflowing with huge young dudes buying diamond studs, not just middle-aged men trying to squeeze some sex out of their wives with a gold necklace.

So while the players on these bowl eligible teams are probably practicing hard, watching film and getting mentally prepared, they’re also thinking about what they’re call sign is going to be in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare.

http://collegefootball.rivals.com/content.asp?CID=1028134