Monday, February 22, 2010

Anyone seen Boner?

Unfortunately, this may be a total non-event for a lot of our readers, but hopefully some of the older folks remember a little show called Growing Pains. Aside from staring religious nut-job and DJ Tanner’s brother Kirk Cameron and being Leonardo DiCaprio’s big-break, Growing Pains had without a doubt one of the sweetest sitcom theme songs of all time. The cast has had it’s fair share of problems, but it remains a family favorite for dudes in my age bracket.

Fans may also remember Mike Seaver’s friend Richard “Boner” Stabone who appeared in 25 episodes played by diminutive actor Andrew Koenig. He was certainly a memorable character. Really, he could’ve been a mute that appeared in one episode and he still would’ve gone down in TV history. How can you forget a character named Boner Stabone? That’s the beauty of television from my younger years; you could really push the envelope, and parents really didn’t care. Sure they wouldn’t let their kids watch NYPD Blue or something like that, but family sitcoms could have a character named after a hard-on in them no problemo. Can you imagine if there was a character named Boner on a family sitcom like Two and a Half-Men today? The public outcry would be outrageous. They would have to write the character off the show, or have his name changed to the more politically correct “Erection.” TV has just changed man

Anyway, Boner disappeared while vacationing with friends in Vancouver. He was last seen on February 14th and was supposed to return home to Venice, California last Tuesday. Police say his family is concerned, as they characterized him as despondent. I don’t mean to make a joke out of this, but if you’re best known for playing a guy named Boner on a show from 20 years ago and you’re 5’5”, 135 pounds there’s probably a decent chance of you being “despondent.” Sure, he was in other things, but if you’re walking down the street and people consistently scream out “Hey Boner!” you kind of have a reason to be a little depressed. And look at the picture in the link compared to the one top left. He went from boner to what looks like a self-loathing hipster. Anyway, we can only hope that Boner comes back safe and sound. The worlds just not the same without him. As Kirk Cameron said in regard to his disappearance, “I refuse to acknowledge the B word, as I am a bat-shit crazy, irrational religious head case who believes in crocoducks.” (Ok, I made that up) You know what Kirk Cameron gave up for Lent? Child molestation. It’s going to be tough for him.

Also, in doing a bit of nostalgic research for this post, I remembered that Maggie Seaver (played by Joanna Kerns) was a total cougar and by the looks of it, still falls under that category. Joanna you are quite the minx.


Beware of fish people. They are the true enemy. -Frank Zappa

1 comment:

Kehny P said...

HAHAHAHAHA! the crocoduck! that shit was hilarious