Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Free Willy Goes Crazy


As I got bored of watching the Canada-Russia game I went to CNN.com and stumbled across quite the story. A SeaWorld trainer was killed by what else, a killer whale. I'll tell you what, if you're surprised by this you need to realize that the whale is called a killer for a reason. That's like people being surprised that a person named rapist Joe, raped someone. Remember when Roy of Sigfried and Roy got mauled by a tiger? Yeah, well I agree with what Chris Rock said regarding the tiger. He said that that tiger didn't go crazy, it went tiger. I'm sure there were will be tons of people all over the news who will try to analyze what made this whale go crazy. I'll tell you what made the whale go crazy, it lived in a fucking tank, did retarded tricks for frozen fish and had to perform in front of a bunch of overweight, hard-to-please, rednecks who only want to get splashed. Don't get me wrong, it's absolutely awful that this woman was killed, but this is just another reason why wild animals belong in the wild, especially if they're name involves the word "killer."

To make matters worse there was an entire crowd there watching this go down. You better believe SeaWorld is going to have some lawsuits coming there way. I've seen some really fucked up shit in my life, but seeing a whale maul a person would be numero uno on my list of fucked up things I've seen. Actually, it may come in close 2nd to the most disturbing internet video ever; one man, one jar. I think I'd rather be a lion trainer than a whale trainer. Wait, no scratch that, I'd actually never want to be a trainer of either. I'm satisfied with training my golden retriever puppy. Puppies are chick magnets, while whales are things you learn about in 2nd grade and never care about again and lions well those are the fucking kings of the jungle. So while the death of the trainer Dawn Brancheau is sad and awful, I think it's just another reason as to why an animal of this size belongs in the wild, killing seals, instead of human beings. Also the whale that murdered this woman was named Tillikum and was actually involved in other deaths I guess. The thing has it's own YouTube video, check it out, pretty crazy stuff.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

one man one jar was incredible. top 3 favorite videos. up there with 2 guys one horse and 2 cups 1 girl.